Self-Love is The Key to Heal Your Relationships
When love is within us, we stop living a conditional existence, we stop waiting for the world to approve of us and we stop denying our true essence
Each person has a unique unconscious mind view of what an ideal romantic relationship is, based on their own filtered translation of their outer world, constituting their parents and other adults, children, books, and movies. These beliefs and ideas governs how a person behaves in moments of stress and also the quality of their decisions and emotional responses.
Most often, we hear complaints that men are not emotional enough’ and ‘women are overly emotional’ or even vice versa. One of the most common complaint being, ‘my partner is no longer the person I met.’ These complaints indicate that our society is living in a box of limiting beliefs and very little knowledge about the art of creating healthy relationships, including non-romantic relationships.
The Idea Of ‘Happily Ever After’
Many minds have the simple version of their happy relationships playing like a movie continuously. Myths and tairytales live in our unconscious minds where the idea of a ‘happily ever after’ is firmly planted. It is something magical, like a prince arriving to win his princess’s heart.
When this happens, the joy experienced takes over the mind and castles are built in the sky, where euphoric display of love is celebrated and a superhuman power executes an awakening in each other, the magnetic state of perceived bliss, whereby a simple rose petal can mean more than a diamond!
However, this illusion is shattered once the reality of a complex relationship starts to press the emotional buttons and people find themselves drowning in uncharted waters. So, in order for us to start re-creating a healthy model of romantic relationships, we first need to learn about the most important of ALL relationships – the one with yourself.
Connecting With Oneself
The lack of an established and well-managed equation with oneself, makes it impossible to live a congruent lite that flows and grows effortlessly. A person who does not love himself herself lives in fear of losing love and people. They start to control how people love them and when their expectations are not met, they fall apart. The solution is to connect with oneself. Hence, here are some valuable questions you can ask yourself:
- Do I love and accept myself Unconditionally?
- What are my limiting beliefs about relationships?
- Do I have a healthy attitude to lite – am I a happy person?
- How do I express love and receive love?
- Do I have enough skills to manage a permanent relationship?
- Are there any unresolved tears and disappointments that are burdening me?
- Do I know what is important to me – can I easily communicate this?
- What are my reasons to be in a relationship?
- Do I naturally exhibit the qualities I seek in a partner?
The ‘Outside In’ Concept
People are living love from the ‘outside in’ concept. This is a very conditional state of living and explains many empty relationships that exist. When love is within us, we stop living a conditional existence, we stop waiting for the world to approve of us and we stop denying our true essence. We become liberated emotionally and we start living with an inner peace. We discover, we can become resilient, understanding and compassionate towards other people. We become skilled intolerance and attain a natural ability to speak our truth, knowing that as we treat ourselves, others learn to treat us.
A Commitment To Life
The art of livtng love with another human being, creating a union deeper than the physical is absolutely possible, it simply requires a new school of thought, some sincere education and a total surrender to learning how to love being in your own body, building a healthy mind and being able to love from a state of unconditional bliss, which requires a commitment to lite. Lite and love Is then appreciated as a gift, instead of a burden In an unknown world, where victims inflict pain on each other, fighting for something that is as available as oxygen.
Understanding What Love Is
We start to realize that we are all maturing with time, we are continuously changing, the things we enjoyed five years ago, is no longer our joy, we learn to detach from the sameness we meet each other in and we start to grow together, allowing each other space to evolve. This is love. As enchanting as this idea is, there are definitely many challenges one has to face in order to create this reality. It could mean that the suffering relationship you are in, needs some resuscitation, perhaps even time apart, emotionally to re-align to yourself and heal your inner wounds. Thus, self-love is the key to healing relationships.