Men Women And Relationships
Men and women co-exist and complement each other though they have differences at a physical and emotional level. The physical differences are rather obvious and have a functional value topped with survival advantage. These differences are in terms of body, strength. skin type etc.
The psychological differences between men and women are similar to their physical differences but much less obvious. They are a bit difficult and at times confusing to describe. Yet, these differences can influence us in our relationships. They can have a profound impact on how we form and maintain a relationship from marriage to work, friendship to parenting and extended family to neighbours and so on.
The challenge is in the perception and execution of our common realities. Differences in thinking, feelings and acting are common between the two genders. It’s not that men and women live in completely different realities, but it’s a gender specific way of gathering experience and knowledge and acting or reacting.
Relationships are never easy. They can be blissful or take a nasty turn depending on what one expects from it. It also depends on how invested both the genders are in their relationship, for example, couples who have been married for a long time. Differences in how men and women handle problems leads to strife, Researchers suggest that men and women process relationship strife differently and need different things from each other.
A wife may take the responsibility for the emotional aspect of the marriage and thus may want support and communication from her husband. On the other hand, it may be possible that the husband may get irritated about spending too much time thinking about it. Emotional vulnerability is often metered in men while women are more comfortable expressing sadness or worry. Role reversals are any day possible with perception of change.
Common Differences In handling Relationships
- Problem Solving
Men approach problems in a different manner compared to women and have a tendency to dominate and assume authority in a problem solving process. It gives them an opportunity to demonstrate their competence to resolve problems in a relationship. Whereas women are usually more concerned about how problems are solved rather than solving the problem themselves. For women, it’s a matter of feeling closer or distant in a relationship.
The whole process can have a positive or negative impact to either strengthen or weaken a relationship. The only way to resolve issues is by being equal so that women can employ a way out of the problem and men can search and explore by trying out analytical connections.
There is evidence that sensitivity has a physiological base. Women may validate this feeling through communication, discussion and exchange of information in an intimate way whereas men find it overwhelming and uncomfortable and these differences are evident in handling relationships.
- Information Exchange, Processing And Thinking
The right side of the brain is our emotional bank and women are good at perceiving, hearing or seeing with the help of their right brain. Men can definitely feel the pull of the right brain but are more focussed on messages provided by it in a more simplistic way and this in turn allows them to take appropriate action.
Tendencies Not Absolutes
The common differences mentioned are tendencies and cannot always be considered as absolutes, but definitely show how men and women individually deal with situations in a relationship.
Memory also plays a role in the handling of relationships by the genders in terms of associating or recalling of an event. Men tend to rely on structural information in maintaining a relationship whereas, women rely on emotional information for sustaining a relationship.
There are also differences in the way men and women analyse a situation. Men concentrate more on verbal analysis where as women use visual, emotional and verbal cues which change the way situations are handled. Men may turn their hurt to anger and women cry out their emotional turmoil. Either way, if the respective reactions prove cathartic, then it may aid in furthering the relationship.
According to psychologist Carl Jung, every man has a feminine side called anima and every woman has a masculine side called animus. This is one of the reasons why men and women handle relationships differently but there is a common ground somewhere.